Translation - Sonnet 2 (English)

Bravo, Lilian! I was just curious to see how those sonnets of mine would sound in English.

As for the last verse, what do you think of "Different tears which share the same salt"?

WOW!!!
Sonnets of yours???

So, we have a poet, here?
I didn't know that.

Those verses are amazing !

For the last line...What about: different tears tasting equally salty. ?

No, no. In this case, keep it as is.

The whole idea is that the same salt is contained in the tears of both lovers, not necessarily at the same amount ["equally salty"].

Yes, those are mine. Written 10+ years ago.

I could edit to "different tears sharing the same salt"

Does that sound better to you?

"Different tears sharing the same salt" looks fine!

Hi!
without cogitating that there is any evil

Are you sure this is correct? It means to take careful thought or think carefully about; ponder. Don't you think a synonym might be better in a poem than cogitating?

Hi David: it's been a long time!

As you can see, I tried to keep to the meaning of the verses as much as possible.Translating poetry is a tough task!

The author, himself, has collaborated greatly.
I used "to cogitate", perhaps influenced by the cognate in Portuguese.
I think "ponder", or "consider" would work well, maybe even better in English, but I'd like Goncin to give his opinion, since "cogitate" is also correct.

What do you think?

It is correct, just not very poetic an a lot of English speakers don't even know the meaning of the word.

David:

There are words in the original that I can asure you not many Portuguese speakers know!

That's why it was so hard to translate.

Reading and understanding poetry is not for anyone.
It's a privilege that we are among those who can do it.

However, I can use "to ponder" instead of "to cogitate" if you wish. It's Ok to me.

I think it fits perfectly as well.

I think that would be better in English

What about "without conceiving of that there is any evil"?

"Ponder" seems to me one is thinking thoroughly (correct me if I'm wrong). In the original text, I meant something like "couldn't ever think of".

Good morning, Goncin.

If you didn't like "ponder" I'll give you some more options. Here you are. Pick one:

1- envisage
2- dream up
3- assume
4- accept
5- admit

or the already mentioned "consider".

Lili,

From now on, I'll let this between you and David. I've already intervened too much...

So, David...I think it's up to you.
I've changed to "ponder", but I may change that as many times as it takes to achieve the most accurate version.
Therefore, after the author's point of view been set...Which do you think woud be the best option?
Now, you pick one!

4ª frase da primeiro 1º poema para ser fiel deveria ser:
By the charm of a subtle woman´s soul.
3ª frase do 2º poema deveria ser:
your sea, houwevever, just wonted me by passing

I like ponder...it reminds me of Poe!

OK, Let it be, ponder, then!

I hope you won't consider those comments above or her vote. They don't make any sense let alone she misspelled everything

Ok. I will get on this as soon as I get back Saturday night.

Hi Lilian,
At the beginning, does
The poet looks at the world, for being his fate,
mean
The poet looks at the world, because it is his fate,
?

Also, I think
Your sea, however, just wanted me by the by,
and I soon disappeared in the beach of that error.
means
Your sea, however, only casually wanted me,
and I was soon shipwrecked on the beach of that error.
?