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 Translation - English-Swedish - and she was gone...
Current status Translation
กลุ่ม Poetry | | | Source language: English
She chose to walk alone.
Though others wondered why.
Refused to look before her,
Kept eyes cast upwards,
Towards the sky.
She didn't have companions.
No need for earthly things.
Only wanted freedom,
From what she felt were puppet strings.
She longed to be a bird.
That she might fly away.
She pitied every blade of grass
For planted they would stay.
She longed to be a flame.
That brightly danced alone.
Felt jealous of the steam
That made the air its only home.
Some say she wished too hard.
Some say she wished too long.
But we awoke one autumn day
To find that she was gone.
Some say she wished too hard.
Some say she wished too long.
But we awoke one autumn day
To find that she was gone.
She chose to walk alone. Though others...
The trees, they say, stood witness.
The sky refused to tell.
But someone who had seen it
Said the story played out well.
She spread her arms out wide.
Breathed in the break of dawn.
She just let go of all she held...
And then she was gone. |
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| och hon var försvunnen... | | Target language: Swedish
Hon valde att vandra ensam.
Även om andra undrade varför.
Vägrade att se framför sig,
Höll ögonen riktade uppåt,
Mot himmelen.
Hon hade inga följeslagare,
Inga behov av jordiska ting,
Ville endast ha frihet,
Från vad hon kände som hundkoppel.
Hon längtade efter att vara en fågel.
Så hon kunde flyga iväg,
Hon tyckte synd om varje grässtrå
För planterade de skulle stanna kvar.
Hon längtade efter att vara en flamma.
Som lysande dansade ensam.
Kände svartsjuka gentemot ångan
Som gjorde luften sitt enda hem.
Vissa säger att hon önskade alltför mycket.
Vissa säger att hon önskade alltför länge.
Men vi vaknade upp en höstdag
För att upptäcka att hon var försvunnen.
Vissa säger att hon önskade alltför mycket.
Vissa säger att hon önskade alltför länge.
Men vi vaknade upp en höstdag
För att upptäcka att hon var försvunnen.
Hon valde att vandra ensam. Även om andra...
Träden, säger de, var vittnen.
Himmelen vägrade att förtälja.
Men någon som hade sett det
Sa att historien slutade gott.
Hon sträckte brett ut sina armar.
Andades in den stigande gryningen.
Hon bara släppte taget av allt hon höll...
Och sedan var hon försvunnen.
| Remarks about the translation | Eftersom detta är "poesi", så har jag använt mer poetiska & i vissa fall ålderdomliga ord. Detta för att kunna återge KÄNSLAN som texten förmedlar!! T.ex. så använder jag ord som himmelen istället för himlen etc. Dessutom så skulle titeln ordagrannt använda det vardagliga & lite banala ordet "borta", men jag anser att "försvunnen" är väsentligt mer poetiskt i sammanhanget.
Mvh. Mats
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Validated by pias - 8 October 2012 09:38
ตอบล่าสุด | | | | |
3 September 2012 23:50 | | | Hi Mats Fondelius,
I think you are not familiar with the site and its features.
Why did you request a translation from an already existing text and did the translation yourself? 
Besides, you did the translation into Swedish, a listed language on Cucumis. The label "Other languages" is used when the requester wants the text to be translated into a language that is not part of our list.
Can you explain what was your intention, please? Perhaps we can help you. | | |
4 September 2012 00:27 | | | Hi, lilian canale!!
First, thanks for your observations and assist.
Yes, you are probably correct in many ways. I haven't been active on the site the last few years at all, so I guess I "lost" track of both old as well as new "Rules & Regulations"...
I was active for some year(s) back in 2007 & onward - so that's an explanation but not an excuse.
To answer your questions:
1. I actually found this poem while scrolling "Translations" and saw that it had not been translated to Swedish as all of the poems before this one; I liked it and decided to translate it into Swedish - simple/awkward as that...
2. I know Swedish is a listed language - it's one of my 9 languages. However, it was not(!) to be seen on the list (Maybe I missed it?), therefore I marked: "Other languages".
3. My intention was just to make a contribution translating a poem I loved while findinding pleasure in doing so. "Points" never mattered to me.
Please, advise me about what went wrong! I'm rusty & have a lot of catching up to do.
Thanks beforehand!!
Mats
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4 September 2012 19:44 | | | OK, I've labeled it as Swedish.
Let's wait for a Swedish expert to evaluate it. 
And...
Welcome back to Cucumis.  | | |
4 September 2012 20:31 | | | Thanks lilian!
Hopefully, I'll catch up being rusty & all. 
Tace care!!
Mats |
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