Dịch - Dutch-English - Misschien lag het aan de grenzeloze arrogantie...

Hi Jollyo

This is mostly ok, but there are one or two corrections that need to be made.

It should read "at Kinshasa airport", and not "on Kinshasa Airport". The French version reads "enième contrôle" which cannot really be translated as "checkpoint number so and so", could you find another way of putting it in English?

"Proposed to us to..." seems a bit clumsy. "Asked us to buy..." seems more readable in English.

If you had written "koala" rather than "cola" I would have accepted "bear" lol Just a typo? In that case it should read "beer".

Bises
Tantine

Hi, Jollyo!

I agree with Tantine. There are some things that must be changed.

Madeleine

I agree with Tantine.

I would rather translate the French text this way:
"Maybe it was the sheer arrogance of the macho on duty - dark sun-glasses, beret drawn over the ears - who, at checkpoint number so-and-so at Kinshasa Airport, suggested, deadpan, that we buy him a cola, or rather a beer?".
"Bear" does not mean "bière" but "ours".

Sorry for the typo
Of course it should say 'beer'

The idea of changing 'proposed' to 'suggested' seems okay to me

I really can not find another description for 'number so-and-so'.
In Dutch (the original language I translated) it means exactly that.
To explain in English: these people have passed numerous checkpoints allready and this is number so-and-so, as in they do not know which number this one was.
Any suggestions?
Maybe: 'one of the countless checkpoints'?

Hi Jollyo, Hi all

You didn't need to explain, the "so and so" bit, as I more or less guessed it from the French version.

"one of the countless checkpoints" seems good to me

The "suggested to us to" is still clumsy in English. Maybe "Suggested that we buy him a cola"

Lol, with the cola and the bear I wondered whether Kinshasa had been moved to Australia

Once you've put your suggested edit in, I'll validate

Kath FR - Jollyo is translating from a Dutch source text, and not from the French, which is a translation from Dutch itself.

If you read my previous message, you will see that I have already noted the error (which was a typo and not a mistranslation). If you look at my profile page you will see that I am bilingual English/French and am already aware that "bière" means beer

Bises à toutes

I like Tantine's
one of their countless checkpoints
better: "so-and-so" doesn't convey the feeling of "endlessness," it just conveys the fact that you don't know/don't care which one it was...
---
Also, because "macho" now often has the overtones of "gay" in North America, we now usually call these tough, brainless, Alpha-male guys "gorillas":
...arrogance of the gorilla on duty...

After looking at both the Dutch and the French, and Cath_FR's suggetion, I think this would be the most accurate:
"Maybe it was the boundless arrogance of the macho type on duty - dark sun-glasses, beret drawn over the ears - who, at the nth checkpoint at Kinshasa Airport, suggested, deadpan, that we just buy him a cola, or rather another beer?"

I think the translation is ok. Not so sure about how commonly used 'unamused' would be here - could you say 'had the cheek to suggest' or so?
Just a suggestion.

Thank you Tantine.
Translation adapted.

If Kinshasa airport would move to Australia, it might be a safer place, though... don't you think?

Hi Jollyo, Hi Ian

In light of Ian's comment about the use of the term macho in North America, it may be more propitious to use the word "gorilla" as suggested.

The rest seems fine to me, so once we have changed a macho into a gorilla I will validate it.

Oof! we will get there in the end

Bises à toutes et à tous
Tantine

Sure!
It is done.


Best regards

"Sheer" needs to be changed, it has a different meaning from the original. I would suggest "boundless" instead.

Also, I'm from North America, and although the song "Macho Man" is popular with gay people, I've never known the word "macho" to have gay overtones.

I think using 'boundless' is taking the word 'grenzeloos' to literal and in my opinion does not match the original text.

And I must say, I haven't heard of this new overtone of the word 'macho' either...

it has to be unamusedly.
though i dont know if thats the right translation for doodleuk .

It's very near correct, but I'd say that enième should be translated as "umpteenth." Also, it seems it should be simply "a beer," in place of "another beer."

I agree upon the suggestion for 'a beer'.
Translation adapted.

Hi Jollyo

It's validated

Bises
Tantine