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10Translation - Polish-English - test

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Category Humor

Title
test
Text
Submitted by Edyta223
Source language: Polish

TEST NA TO CZY MOŻESZ MIEĆ PSA BOKSERA
1.Wybierz się na spacer z jedną ręką prosto wyciągniętą przed siebie. Po kilku krokach spróbuj wyciagnąć ją nieco mocniej i powtórz przyjacielskim głosem z setkę razy "Równaj". Powtórz to samo około setki razy nieco glośniej. Krzyknij w końcu pare razy " Nie ciągnij!".Nie zwracaj uwagi na inne osoby.
2. Zapomnij o luksusowym samochodzie. Kup trochę ciastek i kości. Rozkrusz ciastka na małe kawałeczki i rozrzuć je po całym samochodzie. To samo zrób z kośćmi. Idź do najbliższego fryzjera i poproś o odpady w postaci włosów z całego tygodnia. Rozrzuć je po samochodzie. Następnie nanieś trochę błota na siedzenia i podrap tapicerkę ostrym narzędziem. Zrobiłes to? Doskonale...
3. Przygotuj się do wyjścia. Postaraj się wykraść z domu jak najciszej. Dojdź do połowy ogrodu i wróć się. Spróbuj ponownie tego samego za pięć minut. Wróć się. Włącz radio i nastaw stację z uspakajającą muzyką. Możesz spróbowac wyjść. Wróć się i zadzwoń do przyjaciół, czy nie mogliby przyjść popilnować psa.

4. Jeżeli twój ogród przygotowany jest do sezonu, poproś dzieci sąsiada, aby zagrały w nim w piłkę nożną.
5. Spróbuj czasem siedzieć na 1/8 fotela. Wypróbuj parę sposobów na wypicie kawy w tej pozycji. Spróbuj zjeść ciastko w sekrecie. Poddaj się i zrzuć okruszki z fotela na ziemię.
6. Przywiąż dwa widelce do smyczy i powieś ją na drzwiach. Staraj sie ją zdjąć jak najciszej. Za każdym razem, gdy widelce obiją sie o siebie, podrap się mocno w nogę. Powtórz to parędziesiąt razy.
7. Powtarzaj wszystko co mówisz 5 razy.
8. Gdy przyjdą goście, pozwól im usiaść na kanapie, a nastepnie rzuć im na kolana 30 kg wór pełen ziemniaków i mokrą gąbke na twarz.

9. Wytrenuj sposób zabierania czegoś z lodówki, tak szybko jak to możliwe: przypomnij sobie, co to jest i gdzie to stoi. Otwórz drzwi, weź co chciałeś i szybko je zamknij. Gdy zabierze ci to wiecej czasu niz 10 sekund- przykro mi, ale stracisz wszystko co jest w lodówce i po co sięgaleś.
10. Przyzwyczaiłeś sie do czystego salonu? Spróbuj teraz tego: Zacznij od mycia okien. Są czyste? Świetnie, to teraz utłuść swoje ręce i podotykaj okien. Powtarzaj to dwa razy dziennie. Odkurz podłogę a następnie wysyp na nią wiadro piasku. Odkurz ponownie. Powtarzaj to dwa razy dziennie.
11. Odwiedź znajomego posiadacza boksera i zapytaj się jak do diabla, do tego doszło, że pozwolili bokserowi mieszkać z nimi. Wysłuchaj odpowiedzi w skupieniu- to będzie ostatni raz, gdy to usłyszysz.

12. Aby wyobrazić sobie noc, gdy jesteś posiadaczem boksera (większość z nich śpi w łózku), połóz się spać około 22.00. Nastaw budzik na 24.00 i gdy zadzwoni spadnij z łózka. Włóz do łózka worek z ziemniakami i spróbuj położyć się spać. Nastaw budzik na 5.30 i gdy zadzwoni uderz się mokrą gabką w twarz.
13. Potrafisz poradzic sobie z bałaganem jaki robi bokser w domu? Aby to stwierdzić spróbuj tego: Wyporządkuj dom najlepiej jak się da. Rozrzuć wiadro ziemi po podłodze w kuchni. Resztę rozrzuć pod zlewem i piecem. Zrób również od
Remarks about the translation
Wprowadziłam polskie litery, dodałam przecinki oraz:
z uspakajajaca muzyke --> z uspakajajÄ…cÄ… muzykÄ…
i po dotykaj okien --> i podotykaj okien
<Aneta B.>

Title
TEST
Translation
English

Translated by Aneta B.
Target language: English

A TEST TO SEE IF YOU CAN HAVE A BOXER DOG
1. Take a walk with one arm stretched out in front of you. After few steps try to stretch it out a bit more and say “Heel!” about a hundred times in a friendly voice. Repeat the same thing about a hundred times, but a bit louder. Eventually shout a couple of times: "Do not pull". Pay no attention to others.
2. Forget the luxury car. Buy some cookies and bones. Crumble the cookies into small pieces and scatter them around the car. Do the same with the bones. Go to the nearest hairdresser and ask for a whole week's hair waste. Scatter it around the car. Then put a bit of mud on the seats and scratch the upholstery with a sharp instrument. Have you done it? Perfect!
3. Prepare yourself to go out. Try to slip out of the house as quietly as possible. Get to the middle of the garden and come back. Try to do the same again in five minutes. Come back. Turn the radio on and set up a radio station with relaxing music. You can try to go out. Come back and call friends to ask them if they could come to keep an eye on your dog.
4. If your garden is prepared for the season, ask the neighbour’s kids to play football there.
5. Sometimes try to use just a tiny corner of your armchair. Try a couple of ways to have a cup of coffee in this position. Try to eat a cake in secret. Give up and dump the crumbs out of the chair on the floor.
6. Tie two forks to a leash and hang it on the door. Try to remove it as quietly as possible. Every time the forks strike each other, scratch your leg hard. Repeat this a few dozen times.
7. Repeat whatever you say 5 times.
8. When guests come, let them sit on the couch, and then throw a 30 kg sack full of potatoes on their laps and a wet sponge on their face.
9. Work out a way of picking things up from the fridge as quickly as possible: Remind yourself of what the stuff was and where it was. Open the door, get what you want and close it quickly. If it takes you more than 10 seconds - I'm sorry, but you will lose everything you wanted to get from the fridge.
10. Did you get used to a clean living room? Now try this: Start by cleaning the windows. Are they clean? Great, so now make your hands greasy and touch the windows. Repeat this twice a day. Vacuum the floor and then spill a bucket of sand over it. Vacuum again. Repeat this twice a day.
11. Visit a friend who owns a boxer and ask them how the hell it happened that they allowed the boxer to live with them. Listen attentively to the answer - it is going to be the last time you hear it.
12. To imagine a night when you have a boxer (most of them sleep in a bed), go to bed around 22.00. Set the alarm clock at 24.00, and when it rings, fall off the bed. Put a sack of potatoes on the bed, and try to lay down and go to sleep. Set the alarm for 5.30 and when it rings, hit yourself in the face with a wet sponge.
13. Can you cope with the mess a boxer makes at home? To determine this, try this: Clean your home as well as possible. Scatter a bucket of soil on the floor in the kitchen. Scatter the rest under the sink and the stove.
Remarks about the translation
The last sentence is unfinished, so I haven't translated it.

Hm, it's a pity, but I haven't passed the TEST! ;)
Validated by Lein - 6 October 2011 11:08





Last messages

Author
Message

27 September 2011 16:23

Lein
Number of messages: 3389
Hi Aneta

No, no boxer for me either

A few minor things (it seems like a long list but they are almost all tiny details, just to make it sound more natural:

TEST IF YOU CAN HAVE A BOXER DOG -> Written this way, it looks a bit like a command. If the Polish sentence is about 'a test' (noun, rather than the verb 'to test'), how about writing 'a test' or 'test to see if etc'?

1. Take a walk with one arm stretched out ahead of you. -> I think 'in front of you' is more common in this sense. 'Ahead of you' tends to refer to a long period, or a long way; 'in front of you' is more common when talking about arms (try googling the two to understand what I mean )

After few steps try to stretch it out a bit more and say “Stay!”* about a hundred times in a friendly voice. -> It sounds like you are trying to make the dog stay close to you - 'heel' I think is the common command here.

Repeat the same thing about a hundred times, yet a bit louder. -> 'yet' doesn't seem to fit here. Can we leave it out?

Crumble cakes into small pieces and scatter them around the car.-> shouldn't that be 'the cookies'? (the ones bought in the previous sentence). Do the same with the bones.

Go to the nearest hairdresser and ask for a hair waste of a whole week. -> more natural: a whole week's hair waste OR ask for the, or their, hair waste of a whole week.

Then put a bit of mud on the seats and scratch the upholstery with a sharp instrument.

4. If your garden is prepared for the season, ask the neighbour’s kids to play football there. -> not 'the' football

5. Try sometimes sitting in the 8th seat. -> do you know what is meant by this? Or is it as mysterious in Polish as it is in English?

Give up and dump the crumbs out of the chair on the floor.

Every time the forks strike each other, scratch tight your leg. -> scratch tight? What does that mean?

8. When guests come, let them sit on the couch, and then throw a 30 kg sack full of potatoes on their laps and a wet sponge on their face.

Remind yourself of what the stuff was and where it was put -> better: 'where it was', or 'where you put it'.

I'm sorry, but you will lose everything you wanted to get from the fridge. -> better without 'that' (everything (that) you wanted)

Great, so now make your hands greasy and touch the windows.

11. Visit a friend who is a boxer's owner -> 'who owns a boxer' would sound more natural

ask them how the hell it happened that they allowed the boxer to live with them.

it is going to be the last time you hear it. -> better without 'when' (the last time (when) you hear it)

(most of them sleep in a bed)

Put a sack of potatoes on the bed, and try to lay down and go to sleep.

Set the alarm for 5.30 and when it rings, hit yourself in the face with a wet sponge.

13. Can you cope with the mess a boxer makes at home? -> better without 'that' (the mess (that) a boxer makes)

27 September 2011 17:04

Aneta B.
Number of messages: 4487
Thank you so much for the corrections, dear Lein. I accept them all.

'A TEST TO SEE...'

You know I had no idea what is English equivalent for the command "Równaj". I don't know any of them, but I have found in the Internet that
the five basic dog training commands are: "Sit", "Down", "Stay", "Come", "Heel". The command "heel" seems fine to me, but I would also ask Edyta to be sure.

'yet a bit louder'--> 'but a bit louder'?

'a whole week's hair waste'

'Try sometimes sitting in the 8th seat'. Yes it is a bit mysterious in Polish too. I understood that we are supposed to sit down taking 1/8 of the armchair... (-->at the edge of the armchair?)

'scratch tight' I didn't know how to express that you scratch sth with a power. Firmly?

'Remind yourself of what the stuff was and where it was'


27 September 2011 17:20

Lein
Number of messages: 3389
Thank you Aneta!

I have made it 'scratch your leg hard'.

As for the eith, it sounds like what you are trying to say is 'Occasionally try to use just 1/8th of your chair' (or, with a bit more freedom, 'Sometimes try to use just a tiny corner of your chair'. Does that sound about right?

27 September 2011 23:12

Aneta B.
Number of messages: 4487
Your suggestions sound great! Thanks!

'scratch your leg hard'.
'Sometimes try to use just a tiny corner of your armchair' (it's "armchair "fotel" that was actually used in the sentence)

28 September 2011 13:00

Lein
Number of messages: 3389
Done! Thanks!