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Traducerea - Poloneză-Engleză - Uwielbiam CiÄ™ Stwórco

Status actualTraducerea
Acest text vă stă la dispoziţie în următoarele limbi: PolonezăEngleză

Categorie Poezie

Titlu
Uwielbiam Cię Stwórco
Text
Înscris de Aneta B.
Limba sursă: Poloneză

Światło przenika Ziemię
- zimną Matkę Piękna
Życiodajne smugi
ogrzewajÄ… mokre korzenie

Już tańczą giętko łodygi
rodzą prędko liście
rozlewajÄ… siÄ™ soczystÄ… zieleniÄ…
pachnÄ…cym kwieciem

W górach Twojego Majestatu
wszystkie dzieła
głoszą UWIELBIENIE
Hojności Twojej
Observaţii despre traducere
I ask for translation in British English (even the archaic one, characteristic of the old prayers, hymns

Titlu
I adore Thee, God the Creator
Traducerea
Engleză

Tradus de Aneta B.
Limba ţintă: Engleză

The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks begin to dancing lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy Majesty
All creation
Proclaims ADORATION of
Thy Generosity


Validat sau editat ultima dată de către kafetzou - 19 Octombrie 2009 01:49





Ultimele mesaje

Autor
Mesaj

19 Septembrie 2009 19:46

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
Well, I had a problem with tenses here, as usual...
In Polish source it seems to be Praesent Continuous...- everywhere

19 Septembrie 2009 20:46

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks dance lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy majesty
Every creation leads us
to ADORATION
of Thy generosity

19 Septembrie 2009 20:47

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
P.S. I really like this one - it speaks to me.

19 Septembrie 2009 20:59

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
To me too... Thank you, dear!
The meaning was conveyed in 100 percent! And "lithely"! I was looking for the accurate word and this is the best! The same with "lush"...

"Every creation leads us
to ADORATION
of Thy generosity"

You have changed the meaning here a bit, but I suppose that it is still close to my feeling...

Thank you!!!

And what will Lilly say?

19 Septembrie 2009 21:06

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
I didn't understand how "creation" can "preach" - I took this part to mean that when we look at the beauty that God has created, it forces us to appreciate His generosity. Is that what you meant?

19 Septembrie 2009 21:13

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
It was only a metaphor...

19 Septembrie 2009 23:49

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
Ania has also translated the poem (maybe even before me), so we can think about her version too.

The light penetrates the Earth
- the cold Mother of Beauty.
The Life-giving streaks
Warm up the soggy roots

The stems are dancing flexibly.
swiftly giving birth to the leaves
Being covered with verdure
and blossoming fragrantly.

In the mountains of Your Majesty
All creation
Proclaims admiration of
Your Generosity


Thank you, Ania!

20 Septembrie 2009 18:20

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks dance lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy Majesty
All creation
Proclaims ADORATION of
Thy Generosity


Compilation of Laura's, Ania's and my ideas...





20 Septembrie 2009 19:44

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
Looks good.

20 Septembrie 2009 19:49

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
I'm glad. For me too

21 Septembrie 2009 07:40

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
But, what's better?

"I adore Thee" or "I worship Thee"?


21 Septembrie 2009 16:33

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
They're both OK. BTW, Aneta, if you want the translator to work on the title, it should be in the translation field too. Otherwise she doesn't get credit for it. Of course, in this case YOU are the translator!

21 Septembrie 2009 16:43

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
Oh! I didn't know about it! Thank you!

But "adore" can be used also to people, while
"worship" only to God, am I right?

22 Septembrie 2009 03:38

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
Yes, basically, but when you use "Thee", it's clear that it's about God.

17 Octombrie 2009 13:56

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
I have already edited the translation. Could you check it now, dear Laura?

18 Octombrie 2009 18:31

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
I've made a few small changes (start --> begin to, the Creator God --> God the Creator) and I'll accept this if iluvmilka and one or two others say it's OK.

The problem is, how do I rate this, since you initially translated it yourself, but the current version is a conglomeration of your version, ania's version, and my corrections???

CC: lilian canale

18 Octombrie 2009 18:58

lilian canale
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 14972
If you are asking what I would do, I'd say that IMO it would be fair accepting it with no rating.

18 Octombrie 2009 19:36

kafetzou
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 7963
Ah yes - I forgot about that option - thanks, Lilian.

18 Octombrie 2009 22:40

Aneta B.
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 4487
Very nice idea, Lilly
Thanks a lot to all great translators of my poems!