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 תרגום - צרפתית-ספרדית - Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
מצב נוכחי תרגום
קטגוריה שירה | Il n’y a pas encore de violettes | | שפת המקור: צרפתית
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Et le fond de l’air est frais
L’Astre scintille dans la neige en face
Le gel, doucement, disparaît.
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Et les vents apportent des pluies
L’Astre scintille, au petit matin,
Sur les rigueurs de la nuit.
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Mais leurs feuilles sortent de la terre
Les herbes s’éveillent, les tiges s’allongent
Le sol devient plus vert.
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Mais le roncier bourgeonne
Les crocus sortent, les oiseaux chantent
Les journées sont plus longues
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Mais la promesse contenue
Dans chacun de Ses autres signes
Est « L’Hiver est déchu »
Il n’y a pas encore de violettes
Mais tressons la couronne
Pour accueillir la princesse verte
La Déesse du Printemps
Ruth Kilgallon-Thierry
1° March 2006 | | J'aimerais que les traductions riment de la même manière.
La licence poétique est tolérée dans le mesure où certaines plantes ne sont pas présentes dans certains pays. |
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| TodavÃa no hay violetas. | | שפת המטרה: ספרדית
TodavÃa no hay violetas
El aire se mantiene casi tan frÃo
El sol resplandece en la nieve
El hielo, suavemente se ha ido.
TodavÃa no hay violetas
La lluvia los vientos traen
El astro rey brilla al alba
En los cristales que de noche caen.
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero sus hojas brotan del suelo
El verdor despierta, sus brazos extiende
Más verde aún es de la tierra, su velo.
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero ya brotan las moras
El azafrán crece, los pájaros trinan
Los dÃas alargan sus horas.
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero la promesa que firme sigue
Pone en cada señal suya
Que “El invierno se despideâ€
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Trencemos la corona hermosa
Para recibir a la verde princesa
De la primavera, la diosa.
Ruth Kilgallon-Thierry
1° de Marzo/2006
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אושר לאחרונה ע"י guilon - 2 אפריל 2008 18:21
הודעה אחרונה | | | | |
29 מרץ 2008 21:24 | | | I am really sorry, I have strived to have it well translated into Spanish with the proper rhyme requested, but with no success so far. I can write a beautiful translation but I am not good at metrics and rhyme. Let's see if Lilianca or the others are more endowed. | | |
30 מרץ 2008 00:51 | | | Ok guilon, no problem, you can take your time. I don't want any stress for anyone.
Lilly is a great choice for helping you.
Bises
Tantine | | |
30 מרץ 2008 05:02 | | | Tantine,
this was just a first attempt which will certainly be improved by the suggestions of the many capable people who I hope will help me.
Please, guys, be welcome to post them.
Guilon, en este trabajo vas a tener que meter la nariz y decirme lo que te parece.  | | |
30 מרץ 2008 09:28 | | | My mouth just went slack, Lili, you are good at it, I'll take a look and comment more thoroughly somewhen later. | | |
31 מרץ 2008 20:58 | | | As I said, this translation is outstanding, I would let almost everything unchanged, only two things on the last two strophes:
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero la promesa que firme sigue
Pone en cada señal suya
Es “El invierno se despideâ€
You have three verbs there, I think the third one doesn't fit because of redundancy, I would replace "es" by a conjunction, "que"
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero la promesa que firme sigue
Pone en cada señal suya
Que “El invierno se despideâ€
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Igual cantemos con regocijo
Al recibir a la verde princesa
La primavera, la diosa, un principio.
What the original is saying:
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero trencemos la corona
Para recibir a la verde princesa
La primavera, la diosa, un principio.
Could you Lili find a way to say that with rhymes? I don't think we should change the meaning of the poem.
All the rest seems just perfect to me. | | |
31 מרץ 2008 22:38 | | | Well...after all that support I guess I should start thinking about writing some poems of my own!!!  Thanks Guilon. 
Seriously;
I agree with Guilon on the "multi-verbal" stuff. The last one should be taken out, for sure.
And for the last verse, I translated from the French original, where
"Mais tressons la couronne
Pour accueillir la princesse verte"
I understood as I wrote since there is the expression in French "tresser des couronnes/lauriers à qqn" which means: praise, to show admiration. 
It was difficult to display an image of joy and admiration with some rhyme. I could just find this way 
Maybe Tantine can help us understand the idea better.
What do you say, Ruth?
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1 אפריל 2008 00:10 | | | Hi Lilly
The sense of "tressons la couronne" is exactly that, the idea of making a crown from a garland of flowers or leaves in order to crown the coming princess.
If you can't manage to get a crown (or other similar head gear) to rhyme here, maybe there is some other way of heralding the arrival of spring in such "rejoicing".
Feel free to change words or associations if it helps with either the rhyme or the metric. As long as the general tone is one of relieved, awe-inspired joy at the return of the spring season. If it has a rather "pagan" turn it is even better
Bises
Tantine | | |
1 אפריל 2008 00:42 | | | OK, let's try this:
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Trencemos la corona hermosa
Para recibir a la verde princesa
De la primavera, la diosa.
CC: guilon | | |
1 אפריל 2008 01:17 | | | | | |
1 אפריל 2008 01:51 | | | Sugerencia para la primera estrofa:
"TodavÃa no hay violetas
El aire se mantiene casi tan frÃo
El sol resplandece en la nieve
El hielo se va con el rocÃo." | | |
1 אפריל 2008 01:54 | | | Una simple inversión de palabras resuelve la cuarta estrofa:
"TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero ahora brotan las moras
El azafrán crece, los pájaros trinan
Los dÃas alargan sus horas." | | |
1 אפריל 2008 01:57 | | | Sugerencia para la quinta estrofa:
TodavÃa no hay violetas
Pero la promesa que firme va
En cada una de las señales suyas
Es: “El invierno se despide ya†| | |
1 אפריל 2008 16:31 | | | Lili,
You may want to take a look to goncinho's suggestions, if you'd rather let things as they are I still think your translation is very good, but he has posted some interesting ideas. | | |
1 אפריל 2008 16:57 | | |  Yes guilon, I have used some of Goncinho's suggestions.
Actually that "Pero ya brotan las moras" was perfect!
This is being a great team work! | | |
1 אפריל 2008 17:21 | | | Well, now I'll just let it simmer gently in the oven, and wait to see if someone else has any ingredients to be added, otherwise the plate is ready to be eaten. | | |
1 אפריל 2008 23:52 | | | |
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