Translation - Hebrew-English - מוטי

Hi David,

Could you tell us what you think is wrong?

"the Ukraine" instead of simply "Ukraine" maybe?

Yes, I agree! I am sorry, I was not aware of that change and thank you for bringing it to my attention. Much appreciated!

Quote: "When the region formerly known as “The Ukraine” split off from the old Soviet Union, it declared its preference for dropping the article, and the country is now properly called simply “Ukraine.”"

its only about getting a list of the items

A catalogue is like a list, some companies have catalogues for their products instead of lists and that is why I included both to be on the safe side and it makes the letter also sound more business-like.

Because there has been heavy editing.

Hi ollka,

When a poll is set for a translation, some suggestions may be given by the users and some of them may be accepted by the translator therefore, edited.
There hasn't been so many changes in this one to justify a negative vote, since the final version is correct.
It's up to the expert evaluating the translation decide if the edition done will affect the rating s/he will give (that's what rating is for).
What I mean is that we vote negatively when we think the translation is wrong.
Do you think so?
If yes, please tell us what is wrong and it will be corrected, OK?
However, if your negative vote was due only to the edition made, would you please change it?

ops! I forgot to cc you.

CC: ollka

Hey, I meant that yes, it is correct, but no, it doesn't say what the original says (see note below where it says they've brought it closer to business English)

What in the translation do you think does not convey the original?
Adapting the statements to a more business-like style seems correct to me... , unless it changes the meaning. Did that happen?

It is written much better than the original, but it misses some points (like the price for transporting etc.), and the meaning is not entirely identical. It might be very helpful for the writer, though....

I absolutely agree with Milkman. I think in general, such extensive editing is unacceptable in a translation unless requested. However, it might indeed prove helpful in this case.

Hi Milkman, could you please send in PM an accurate bridge, so I can decide on this?

Thank you in advance.

CC: milkman

OK Aspie Brain,

It seems that you added too much information to the original text. I see you tried to improve it but... could you shrink it a bit and leave only what the original says?

Thanks AspieBrain, I'll set a new poll.

Maybe I did not exactly understand what the point was of 'translating' in Cucumis.

I thought that I had to take into consideration the idiosyncrasies and linguistic needs of each language, and NOT just translate word by word the given text.

You see, Hebrew is a 'very direct' and 'to the point' language, while English has many ways of says something depending on who says it and who will hear/read it.

If I translate the Hebrew letter into English it will sound 'too direct' and 'to the point,' which is NOT appropriate for a business letter in English.

I did as Lilian asked and edited my translation to represent an exact translation of the Hebrew text.

Below, is the translation that I feel would be more appropriate.

Dear sir(s),
I am a representative of a number of companies in Israel and Ukraine, and I am interested inrepresenting your products in both Israel and Ukraine. Therefore, I would like to receive a catalogue or a list of all your products and their prices. I would also like to know the costs for transporting your products to the above mentioned countries.
Thank you in advance,

I think the correct terminology would be "price quote" and not "offer", and would ask to receive "shipping costs" and not "transportation", and "comprehensive" quotes rather than "complete" ones. Also, I would say "for all of your products", not "of all of your products." Otherwise no problem.

Isn't it nice to agree?