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Translation - Turkish-English - Arkadaki Çocuğu görüyormusun Ne kadar sevinmiş...

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Title
Arkadaki Çocuğu görüyormusun Ne kadar sevinmiş...
Text
Submitted by Granger21
Source language: Turkish

Arkadaki Çocuğu görüyormusun Ne kadar sevinmiş bir belge aldığına elindeki kağırtı kameraya sokacak.Sanırım ashley ile birlikte büyüdün ve şuanda da aynı okuldasınız ve birliktesiniz. Bu mükemmel birşey

Title
Could you see the child behind? How happy he is ...
Translation
English

Translated by tradtu
Target language: English

Could you see the child behind?
He is so happy handling a document that it seems he will get it into the camera.
I think Ashley and you grew up together ; and now you are both going to the same school and you are still together.
What a wonderful thing it is !
Validated by lilian canale - 21 September 2008 22:29





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18 September 2008 15:45

lilian canale
จำนวนข้อความ: 14972
Hi Tradtu,

Sometimes when translating into English we need to change the structure of the sentences which appear in the original in order to be more "natural".
I'd suggest some changes in this text.

In the first line I'd use "can" instead of "could"
The second line would read better as:
"He is so happy handling a document...

grow up ---> growing up

"and now you are being at the same school together" could be either: "and now you are studying in the same school together" or "and now you are both going to the same school"

What do you think? Does that convey the original?

19 September 2008 13:02

tradtu
จำนวนข้อความ: 21
Hi.

I'm agree with you that all languages don't possess the same syntax order.

At first, I don't use "can" because it supposes to give a positive answer automatically. Doesn't "could" express the continuity of the action to see the child ? Because, in Turkish, the verb is writing with the -ING time, "görüYORmusun".

Second, ok for the second line ; it's better without the inversion of the phrase. But is the emphatism of the happiness correctly felt ? I suppose so.

Third, "grow up" is a finished action in the original text - the verb is in the past time. I change the last part of the clause dealing with the school. Your example is better : "and now you are both going to the same school together."

Thanks. See you.

19 September 2008 14:12

lilian canale
จำนวนข้อความ: 14972
Hi tradtu,

It's OK if you use "could", however this line:

"I think Ashley and you are grown up together ; and now you are both going to the same school together" still needs correction.

"are grown up" is incorrect if the event is in the past it should be "grew up" or "have grown up".
and for the last part of the sentence you may user either "both" or "together", using the two words in the same sentence looks redundant.

19 September 2008 19:29

tradtu
จำนวนข้อความ: 21
Hi.

I must add "and you are still together" because of "ve birliktesiniz" that means "to be together at this moment". The author would insist that the two characters are still together.


19 September 2008 20:00

lilian canale
จำนวนข้อความ: 14972
Now, it's acceptable. I'll set a poll, OK?

19 September 2008 20:46

tradtu
จำนวนข้อความ: 21
Ok! Thanks!

Just a little question : what is a poll ?
I'm a new user of this website...


Bye.

19 September 2008 20:54

lilian canale
จำนวนข้อความ: 14972
The expert who evaluates your translations into English is an expert for English, therefore corrects the grammar and structure of the English version, but when s/he doesn't know the source language (Turkish in this case) has to ask for the help of the community to know if the translation is correct in meaning as well. That's what a poll is intended for. The users who master both languages vote positively if the think the translation conveys the meaning and negatively when they think something is wrong. In that case, they usually give suggestions about the corrections they think should be made. After everything was corrected the translation is ready to be validated, or not.