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Original text - English - Notes on a Music Album #1

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Title
Notes on a Music Album #1
Text to be translated
Submitted by salimworld
Source language: English

"Abrahadabra" is a reflection of my exaggerated personal feelings. It is the first endeavor to my idea of “pictorial rock” - i.e. composition of sounds that recite a sequence of mental pictures. Actually all of these instrumental tracks have a real-life story behind them. There are very vague allusions to these stories in the CD booklet. e.g. “Route” is the story of a death ceremony and recites the mourning over the dead in a way that is done in eastern culture. Or “Told to the Bird” is the story of my own confession to a bunch of flying birds in a ritualistic way... In one sentence, while composing this album, I felt very lovesick, idealist and outraged.
Remarks about the translation
"Abrahadabra" is name of a music album. Please don't translate it.
Edited by lilian canale - 9 Tháng 7 2011 14:07





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27 Tháng 6 2011 23:58

salimworld
Tổng số bài gửi: 248
Please use "Netherlands Dutch" dialect for Dutch translation

7 Tháng 7 2011 20:17

Lein
Tổng số bài gửi: 3389
Hi Salim

A small remark about about the English text: 'mourning over dead' doesn't sound like something a native speaker would say. I think you probably want to say 'the dead' - or maybe 'mourning over death'?

7 Tháng 7 2011 20:21

salimworld
Tổng số bài gửi: 248
Dear Lein,

Thanks for the point. You are right. "Mourning over death" would be a better term.


8 Tháng 7 2011 07:01

Lein
Tổng số bài gửi: 3389
Hello all,

As per the discussion above, I have changed the original 'mourning over dead' into 'mourning over death'. Could you all have a look at your translation (for Siberia, the translation you accepted) to see if it needs changing?
Thanks!

CC: Aneta B. Efylove lilian canale Siberia

8 Tháng 7 2011 07:43

Siberia
Tổng số bài gửi: 611
Well, in Russian "mourning over dead" has more sense than that new varient. I'd prefer to leave translation as is if Salim agrees.

8 Tháng 7 2011 07:52

salimworld
Tổng số bài gửi: 248
Hi Siberia,
In eastern cultures people gather and mourn for dead ones in a ritualistic way... As long as the phrase conveys the meaning it is ok with me


8 Tháng 7 2011 10:44

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Thank you, Lein, for your notification, but I wouldn't change anything in my version. In my country (as in Russia) we never say that "we mourn over death" (opłakujemy śmierć), but we say "we mourn over the dead" (opłakujemy zmarłych) and that is just how I have it translated. Alternatively we say that "we mourn over death of the deceased" (opłakujemy śmierć zmarłego).

I just think that Salim all the time meant "the dead" = dead people, and only an article "the" was missing here

8 Tháng 7 2011 13:37

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
I agree, "over the dead" would be better.

9 Tháng 7 2011 12:29

Lein
Tổng số bài gửi: 3389
Hi all,
That was my initial interpretation too
I will be off line for the coming week so if 'death' should be changed to 'the dead', please cc Lilian or another English expert

9 Tháng 7 2011 14:09

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
Got it! Edited.