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| | 17 December 2010 16:33 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | Sounds like a kind of credo (statement of belief). Let's see if we can make it flow
1. I don't plead to the rosebud, grown up in furious ones -> do you mean 'pray' instead of 'plead'? Does the second part mean '(that has) grown into a furious flower'? If not, could you explain what it means?
2. I don't know language, I don't plead to language -> ? what is meant by pleading to a language? Google translate (not much good for Turkish to English translations most of the time, so it may very well be completely wrong) says something about 'gratitude' in this line. Does that make sense?
3. the One who guards my bridge is Allah
4. I don't plead to the way which is taught by the devil -> again, what is the meaning of 'plead' here? Could it be pray?
5. I got into such strange trouble, everybody goes (is going?) their own way
6. I found today, I ate today, tomorrow I thank Allah -> I have added a comma. Does that work? Or maybe it should be 'I ate today what I found today, ... (or something else - in that case, please explain what is meant)
7. I have not the slightest desire for worldly property -> I have changed this sentence. Is this what the Turkish text says?
8. the One who gives me my food is Allah, I don't plead to people -> ask anything from people? beg from people?
In all cases, 'plead' is a bit awkward here. Have a look at what this (well respected) dictionary gives for the meaning of 'to plead': http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/plead
Thanks again |
| | 17 December 2010 22:21 |
| | Hi!
It would be fine if the requester could quote the author of this text, whatever it is (poetry, lyrics?) 'Must have been written by someone religious, it shows an ascetic (Franciscan like) monk's point of view, someone living by his own, retired, in contact with his god.
Knowing the author always helps, it may give access to a translation that probably was already done.
I tried to google the text but couldn't find out who wrote it. |
| | 19 December 2010 00:02 |
| | Hi Lein, Francky.
@Francky.
Yes, this is a religious text and I also could not find author of this but this poetic writing does not seem a professional one. The requester would write this down.
@Lein,
1.) in here, 'plead to' is used for 'ask for a favor'. The second part of the first line means exactly what you said.
2.) Yes, Gratitude. In Turkish as well, this does not make any sense.
4.) all 'plead to' from beginning to end means 'gratitude'.
5.) let me give you a reference, it is an idiom :
http://idioms.yourdictionary.com/go-one-s-way
goes one's way.
6.) this is thanksgiving to Allah. in that line, it is meant that if I found something to eat, I eat it within the day. I have nothing to eat for tomorrow. At the end of the day, I thank to Allah for what He gave.
7.) Yours is much better than what I wrote.
8.) Again, there is thanksgiving here. My food is given by Allah. I dont ask for a favor from people, I dont need anybody except Allah.
I did not find the meaning of plead used here but in cambridge dictionary, it is the first meaning of plead used in this text.
to make an urgent, emotional statement or request for something
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/british/plead_1
Thanks..
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| | 22 December 2010 17:52 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | Hello again
Sorry I took a while - I was taking care of the part of my life not spent on cucumis
I have changed according to what I think the conclusions from the discussion above were. However, my brain seems to be shutting down so let me know if there are things that are now incorrect! I have also set a poll.
By the way, as long as a poll has not been set, the translation is still 'open' for you, i.e. you can still edit as you like. Sometimes that may be easier than asking me or another expert to do it |
| | 23 December 2010 17:25 |
| | Wow...It is a difficult text.
Some suggestions;
LÄ°NE 1
I don't ask anything from the rosebud, grown into a furious flower ...> I don't appreciate the rosebud which has opened (grown) into the furious people.
LINE 2
I don't know the language, but I know gratitude...> I don't know the language,I don't express gratitude.
LINE 4
I don't ask for anything from the devil's teachings...> I don't appreciate the way that devil teachs.
LINE 5
I got into such strange trouble...>I felt into such a strange trouble. |
| | 23 December 2010 17:54 |
| | Hi, Lein
it is good to see you again.
The first line of the translation should be 'grown into furious flowers'.
The second line of it should be 'I dont know language, I dont ask anything from it (which means language, I know it is meaningless to you but the source text says that)'
The fourth line of it should be what merdogan said.
the rest of translation is wonderful by the help of you.
Hi Merdogan,
as your suggestions,
Line 1: it is kind of metaphor, so we cannot say 'grown into furious people' since it is mentioned that rosebud which grows in other flowers.
Line 2: your suggestion gives meaning.
Line 4: I agree with your suggestion.
Line 5: both of them is ok. |
| | 23 December 2010 22:17 |
| | Dear Çevirmen,
Line 1
I don't think it you agree with 'grown into furious flowers'.
Somebody want to say he/she dosen't want any rosebud from a people who is furious. Because this people is a bad people.
I didn't understand why do you want to use "furious flowers". Is there any flower like this? But there are alot of people like this.
|
| | 23 December 2010 23:42 |
| | as i declared in my last comment, it is a metaphor..when you say 'cruel world', the world is not cruel here, people who live in it are cruel. That was just an example.. |
| | 24 December 2010 09:16 |
| | Dear Çevirmen,
Forgive me but,
I am not agree with you if it is metaphor or not.
It is a reality. Everybody can be furious.
And "to be cruel" and " to be furious" have not the same meaning. In this case "to be furies" is better, ofcouse for me. |
| | 1 January 2011 21:04 |
| | Hi!
I think the translation is fine but there's a mistake in the second line. The original sentence is : "Ben dil bilmem, dile minnet etmem". It is translated like this:
"I don't know the language, but I know gratitude"
But the second part gives the contrary meaning. It should be something like this:
"I don't know the language and I don't have any gratitude for it." |
| | 3 January 2011 12:37 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | Hello all
I think we are getting closer
I have edited according to Çevirmen's replies.
As far as I understand, the 'rosebud' stands for the way someone was, before he grew into a 'furious flower'. Is that close to the meaning of the poem?
For the second line, Çevirmen and Bilge Ertan gave a somewhat different suggestion to correct it. I picked Çevirmen's, because he has done this translation. Could you two let me know if this is right? (Feel free to discuss in Turkish, as long as you let me know the result of your discussion in English |
| | 3 January 2011 12:38 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | As happens so often, I forgot the cc but I would like to hear your opinion, Bilge Ertan CC: Bilge Ertan |
| | 3 January 2011 17:21 |
| | Hello
I think it's OK now, " I don't know language, I don't ask anything from it" is correct. In fact, according to the text, the rosebud doesn't grow into a "furious flower", it grows into someone furious. But I guess it is better in this way. "into a furious flower". What do you think Çevirmen? |
| | 11 January 2011 16:20 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | OK, I'm about to accept this one but I am just not happy with that 'I don't know language'. It sounds very unnatural, like a word is missing. Is that the same in the Turkish text?
Do we not know anything about the language he doesn't know? For example
I don't know its language (of the rosebud)
or
I don't know any language
If it sounds unnatural in Turkish too and there is nothing more we know, I will accept this as it is... Thanks again CC: Bilge Ertan |
| | 11 January 2011 16:49 |
| | Yeah, it sounds unnatural in Turkish,too. It's a weird text as you see, it's related to the religion and I think here this sentence means that he or she appreciates only the communication with God which we don't need any words while doing this, you know when we pray, the language we speak doesn't matter, it's unimportant. Is it more clear now? |
| | 11 January 2011 16:52 |
| LeinNumber of messages: 3389 | OK, yes, it's a bit clearer
Does my comment explain what you said? CC: Bilge Ertan |
| | 11 January 2011 17:03 |
| | Yeah, absolutely Don't worry, the Turkish text is not easy to understand at all, it's so normal for the English one to be like this. I think it's OK
By the way, in the Turkish text there were some spelling mistakes, I have corrected them. |