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| | 6 September 2009 17:40 |
| | I ask Lilian Canale to take care of the evaluation. CC: lilian canale |
| | 6 September 2009 18:30 |
| | 'Where do you hide the seeds
Of philanthropic love?'
Ania, it isn't exactly what I wanted to say in this place.
where do you hide germs/seeds
of beneficial abundance?
I meant here about lots of gifts (from God) I receive all the time in a summer time...
But in this place, your version I like more:
Where is the spring of my spring dreams?
Super!!!
Spring as a source! And the word game!
Thank you!
|
| | 6 September 2009 20:38 |
| | Im sorry, i have to write this message in polish so you'll understand it better.
Mogę sie mylić, ale słowo "germ" jest często używane w znaczeniu zarazek,wirus albo bakteria. W każdym razie, to słowo kojarzone jest raczej z czyms negatywnym a nie 'zalązkiem' czegos dobrego.
A 'seeds' użyłabym chocby z tego wzgledu, ze isnieje pewna przypowiesc w Biblii odnosnie ziaren rozrzucanych na płodna ziemie i na skały, takze jesli chcesz odnieść się do darów od Boga, to mysle ze 'seeds' bedzie najlepszym okresleniem.
A co do beneficial abundance to oczyiwsice tez brzmi poprawnie, ale troche skomplikowanie. Ale oczywiscie to jest poezja i nie może byc zbyt przystepna
Pozdrawiam
xx |
| | 6 September 2009 20:53 |
| | i znowu piszesz po polsku, Aniu... Dla angielskiego eksperta Twoje komentarze w języku polskim są nieużyteczne. Lilly powiedziała mi, że polski jest dla niej tajemnicą" hehe... więc proszę Cię jeszcze raz o angielskie komentarze pod tłumaczeniami. Wiadomości prywatne do mnie możesz pisać po polsku oczywiście...
Ale zgadzam się z Tobą co do tych "seeds"... Masz tę wrażliwość językową i poetycką, na której mi zależy. Tak się cieszę, że zaczęłaś tłumaczyć moje wiersze...
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Lilly, "seeds" are much more better here than "germs"... |
| | 6 September 2009 21:43 |
| | Right, its no problem at all. I just wanted you to understand the difference between the seeds and germs and it was easier to explain it in polish.I know you would understand it anyway
|
| | 7 September 2009 23:27 |
| | I don't know Polish at all, so my suggestions will be just guesses about how it would sound more poetic in English, OK?
Beloved
Tree of happiness
You surprise me in summertime
Lush fruit(s) ...
What are you, oh tree?
In winter
Just insensitive timber
Under heavy cold snow
Where do you hide the seeds of
Abundant charity?
Where is the source of the spring of my dreams?
Nothing heralds them
And yet …
It's up to you, Aneta |
| | 8 September 2009 00:42 |
| | It is beautiful, Lilly!
Lush fruit(s) ...
Maybe "with lush fruit"
because the tree suprises me just with it...
What do you think, dear?
|
| | 8 September 2009 00:13 |
| | Just insensitive timber
Under heavy cold snow ?
and I am not sure about the end.
What do exactly mean the words "And yet"?
I translated it myself "A jednak" --> "However", because I meant that I know the tree will have fruit once again when winter is over, so, although(however) it is "just insensitive timber" in winter, I will have a hope that it changes after the spring...
Well, it is a quite new poem of mine. From the previous week... So I'm probably very sensitive about it... It's just a poem but expresses my feelings strongly... This is my fear about coming winter... I'm not so enthusiastic person in wintertime as I am now... |
| | 8 September 2009 00:20 |
| | And yet... gives that meaning of even though, although, however...
I think it's fine, but YOU are the poet
I'll edit that "with" and the question mark. |
| | 8 September 2009 00:24 |
| | If you say it is the same: "And yet" and "However", I agree.. Let leave us your version...
Thank you, my dear Ania and Lilly!!! You started sth very important for me. I'm so grateful...
I really need the translations... (I will tell you why one day) |