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Translation - Portuguese brazilian-English - Soneto (2)Current status Translation
This text is available in the following languages:
| | | Source language: Portuguese brazilian
TITANIC
Olha ao mundo o poeta, porque é a sua sina, Sem jamais cogitar qualquer maldade haver, E se deixa, inocente, de amor envolver Pelo encanto sutil de uma alma feminina.
De teus olhos assim mergulhei no oceano, Naveguei em teus braços, doce calmaria. Teu mar, porém, só de passagem me queria, E logo naufraguei na praia desse engano.
Ora sei que por mim choras, arrependida, Fere-te a solidão, culpa daquele mal, Pois sabes que é única a paixão de uma vida.
O pranto que derramas encontra seu igual Naquele que chorei por tua despedida, Lágrimas diferentes que têm o mesmo sal... |
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| | | Target language: English
TITANIC
The poet looks at the world, for being his fate, without pondering that there is any evil, and allows himself to be involved, innocently, by love because of the subtle appeal of a woman's soul.
From your eyes, I dove into the ocean, I sailed in your arms, sweet lull. Your sea, however, just wanted me by the by, and I soon disappeared in the beach of that error.
I know you weep for me now, regretful, solitude hurts you, because of that evil since you know the passion of a life is unique.
The tears you cry match their peers, those I cried at your farewell, different tears sharing the same salt... |
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Validated by dramati - 16 February 2008 20:37
ตอบล่าสุด | | | | | 12 February 2008 11:10 | | | I could edit to "different tears sharing the same salt"
Does that sound better to you? | | | 12 February 2008 11:25 | | | "Different tears sharing the same salt" looks fine! | | | 12 February 2008 12:44 | | | Hi!
without cogitating that there is any evil
Are you sure this is correct? It means to take careful thought or think carefully about; ponder. Don't you think a synonym might be better in a poem than cogitating?
| | | 12 February 2008 14:02 | | | Hi David: it's been a long time!
As you can see, I tried to keep to the meaning of the verses as much as possible.Translating poetry is a tough task!
The author, himself, has collaborated greatly.
I used "to cogitate", perhaps influenced by the cognate in Portuguese.
I think "ponder", or "consider" would work well, maybe even better in English, but I'd like Goncin to give his opinion, since "cogitate" is also correct.
What do you think? | | | 12 February 2008 14:24 | | | It is correct, just not very poetic an a lot of English speakers don't even know the meaning of the word. | | | 12 February 2008 14:33 | | | David:
There are words in the original that I can asure you not many Portuguese speakers know!
That's why it was so hard to translate.
Reading and understanding poetry is not for anyone.
It's a privilege that we are among those who can do it.
However, I can use "to ponder" instead of "to cogitate" if you wish. It's Ok to me.
I think it fits perfectly as well.
| | | 13 February 2008 10:47 | | | I think that would be better in English | | | 13 February 2008 11:05 | | | What about "without conceiving of that there is any evil"?
"Ponder" seems to me one is thinking thoroughly (correct me if I'm wrong). In the original text, I meant something like "couldn't ever think of". | | | 13 February 2008 11:24 | | | Good morning, Goncin.
If you didn't like "ponder" I'll give you some more options. Here you are. Pick one:
1- envisage
2- dream up
3- assume
4- accept
5- admit
or the already mentioned "consider". | | | 13 February 2008 11:52 | | | Lili,
From now on, I'll let this between you and David. I've already intervened too much... | | | 13 February 2008 12:01 | | | So, David...I think it's up to you.
I've changed to "ponder", but I may change that as many times as it takes to achieve the most accurate version.
Therefore, after the author's point of view been set...Which do you think woud be the best option?
Now, you pick one! | | | 14 February 2008 17:40 | | | 4ª frase da primeiro 1º poema para ser fiel deveria ser:
By the charm of a subtle woman´s soul.
3ª frase do 2º poema deveria ser:
your sea, houwevever, just wonted me by passing
| | | 15 February 2008 08:21 | | | I like ponder...it reminds me of Poe! | | | 15 February 2008 10:24 | | | | | | 15 February 2008 14:36 | | | Ok. I will get on this as soon as I get back Saturday night. | | | 16 February 2008 01:03 | | | Hi Lilian,
At the beginning, does
The poet looks at the world, for being his fate,
mean
The poet looks at the world, because it is his fate,
? | | | 16 February 2008 01:08 | | | Also, I think
Your sea, however, just wanted me by the by,
and I soon disappeared in the beach of that error.
means
Your sea, however, only casually wanted me,
and I was soon shipwrecked on the beach of that error.
? | | | 16 February 2008 01:10 | | | Yes, Ian . Exactly.
That is valid for both messages. | | | 16 February 2008 01:11 | | | Yes, Ian both guesses are correct. | | | 16 February 2008 19:10 | | | |
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