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| | 24 Tháng 9 2011 19:45 |
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| | 24 Tháng 9 2011 22:51 |
| | Before evaluating the translation, please ask Alex to adapt it to the edit I made in the original. I added "I want" in the beginning of the first sentence to fit our rules. |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 16:02 |
| | Alex, could you, pls. ![](../images/emo/smile.png) |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 16:26 |
| | I hope I've made the right changes. ![](../images/emo/smile.png) |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 16:41 |
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| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 18:43 |
| | "I want to be free to fly,
To be free to feel the love the moon taught me.
To be free to show the sky is within a stone's throw (very close).
To be free, to be what I have dreamed (to be)." |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 23:21 |
| | Thanks!
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Hi Alex,
I've got some tips for you, if you don't mind:
1."ut amorem doctum a luna sentiam" sounds a bit unclear.
"ut amorem a luna doctum sentiam" would be so much clearer.
But as a matter of fact, I wouldn't use participium "doctum" here. It is too ambiguous, because it might be also an adjective.
What about:
"ut amorem quem ex luna didici sentiam"?
2. "ut monstrem coelum iam illic esse"
"monstrem" --> to the end of the sentence, please.
"coelum iam illic esse" --> coelum instare (=to be close)?
3. The most difficult one: "quod somniavi esse"
--> "ut is/id sim, de quo me esse somniavi"?
They are just my proposals. Tell me, Alex, whether you like them or not.
![](../images/wm_act1.png) |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 23:31 |
| | Aneta
1. "ut amorem quem e luna didici sentiam"
You know, I always try to think "Latinly" and to translate by asking myself what an ancient Roman would have said.
It is not as easy as it may seem, but luckily I have you
2. "ut coelum instare monstrem"
I've never seen the verb "instare" before...
3. Yes, here I didn't make the right changes.
Can we drop "is/id"? Would "ut sim de quo me esse somniavi" sound weird?
Nice avatar! Whose are those eyes? |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 23:38 |
| | Unfortunately not mine, but they are so Cucumis-like...
No, it wouldn't. We can skip the subject (is/id) indeed.
Macte, amice! ![](../images/emo/smile.png) |
| | 25 Tháng 9 2011 23:51 |
| | Gratias maximas tibi ago, magistra! ![](../images/bisou2.gif) |
| | 13 Tháng 11 2011 22:18 |
| | I know we have already reached a consensus about the translation. However, I'd make one more change if you didn't mind, dear friend.
Liberam esse ut sim de quo me fore somniavi.
fore=futurum esse
How do you think? ![](../images/wm_act1.png) |
| | 14 Tháng 11 2011 15:12 |
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| | 14 Tháng 11 2011 16:12 |
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