Cucumis - 网上免费翻译服务
. .



翻译 - 波兰语-英语 - Uwielbiam CiÄ™ Stwórco

当前状态翻译
本文可用以下语言: 波兰语英语

讨论区 诗歌

标题
Uwielbiam Cię Stwórco
正文
提交 Aneta B.
源语言: 波兰语

Światło przenika Ziemię
- zimną Matkę Piękna
Życiodajne smugi
ogrzewajÄ… mokre korzenie

Już tańczą giętko łodygi
rodzą prędko liście
rozlewajÄ… siÄ™ soczystÄ… zieleniÄ…
pachnÄ…cym kwieciem

W górach Twojego Majestatu
wszystkie dzieła
głoszą UWIELBIENIE
Hojności Twojej
给这篇翻译加备注
I ask for translation in British English (even the archaic one, characteristic of the old prayers, hymns

标题
I adore Thee, God the Creator
翻译
英语

翻译 Aneta B.
目的语言: 英语

The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks begin to dancing lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy Majesty
All creation
Proclaims ADORATION of
Thy Generosity


kafetzou认可或编辑 - 2009年 十月 19日 01:49





最近发帖

作者
帖子

2009年 九月 19日 19:46

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
Well, I had a problem with tenses here, as usual...
In Polish source it seems to be Praesent Continuous...- everywhere

2009年 九月 19日 20:46

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks dance lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy majesty
Every creation leads us
to ADORATION
of Thy generosity

2009年 九月 19日 20:47

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
P.S. I really like this one - it speaks to me.

2009年 九月 19日 20:59

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
To me too... Thank you, dear!
The meaning was conveyed in 100 percent! And "lithely"! I was looking for the accurate word and this is the best! The same with "lush"...

"Every creation leads us
to ADORATION
of Thy generosity"

You have changed the meaning here a bit, but I suppose that it is still close to my feeling...

Thank you!!!

And what will Lilly say?

2009年 九月 19日 21:06

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
I didn't understand how "creation" can "preach" - I took this part to mean that when we look at the beauty that God has created, it forces us to appreciate His generosity. Is that what you meant?

2009年 九月 19日 21:13

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
It was only a metaphor...

2009年 九月 19日 23:49

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
Ania has also translated the poem (maybe even before me), so we can think about her version too.

The light penetrates the Earth
- the cold Mother of Beauty.
The Life-giving streaks
Warm up the soggy roots

The stems are dancing flexibly.
swiftly giving birth to the leaves
Being covered with verdure
and blossoming fragrantly.

In the mountains of Your Majesty
All creation
Proclaims admiration of
Your Generosity


Thank you, Ania!

2009年 九月 20日 18:20

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
The sunlight penetrates through the Earth -
Cold Mother of Beauty
Life-bringing rays
Warm wet roots

Stalks dance lithely
They quickly bear leaves
They spill over with lush greenery
With fragrant blossoms

In the mountains of Thy Majesty
All creation
Proclaims ADORATION of
Thy Generosity


Compilation of Laura's, Ania's and my ideas...





2009年 九月 20日 19:44

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
Looks good.

2009年 九月 20日 19:49

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
I'm glad. For me too

2009年 九月 21日 07:40

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
But, what's better?

"I adore Thee" or "I worship Thee"?


2009年 九月 21日 16:33

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
They're both OK. BTW, Aneta, if you want the translator to work on the title, it should be in the translation field too. Otherwise she doesn't get credit for it. Of course, in this case YOU are the translator!

2009年 九月 21日 16:43

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
Oh! I didn't know about it! Thank you!

But "adore" can be used also to people, while
"worship" only to God, am I right?

2009年 九月 22日 03:38

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
Yes, basically, but when you use "Thee", it's clear that it's about God.

2009年 十月 17日 13:56

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
I have already edited the translation. Could you check it now, dear Laura?

2009年 十月 18日 18:31

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
I've made a few small changes (start --> begin to, the Creator God --> God the Creator) and I'll accept this if iluvmilka and one or two others say it's OK.

The problem is, how do I rate this, since you initially translated it yourself, but the current version is a conglomeration of your version, ania's version, and my corrections???

CC: lilian canale

2009年 十月 18日 18:58

lilian canale
文章总计: 14972
If you are asking what I would do, I'd say that IMO it would be fair accepting it with no rating.

2009年 十月 18日 19:36

kafetzou
文章总计: 7963
Ah yes - I forgot about that option - thanks, Lilian.

2009年 十月 18日 22:40

Aneta B.
文章总计: 4487
Very nice idea, Lilly
Thanks a lot to all great translators of my poems!