Prevođenje - Japanski-Engleski - 今は何も言わずに

The English is a little bit stiff. I would say you should try something like this:

I want to hold you in my arms now without saying anything and by this accomplish holding in my hands what my eyes perceive.
in a world in which nothing is certain
You know, at this time there are things to be said, so open up your closed heart


CC: IanMegill2

Hi dramati,
Here is the literal translation:
---
Hold me now, without saying anything
Everything our eyes see (lit. "that touches our eyes" ) and that we hold (i.e. that we can touch with our hands)
(This is a) world (where) nothing is certain (lit. "there's nothing certain or anything" )
It's thanks to this moment that we can say certain things (lit. "because it is now, certain things are say-able", i.e. take advantage of this moment to say what you usually can't)
So open your closed heart
---
Now you can "read the Japanese" too, so you can make the corrections you deem suitable to the translation!
PS: the first line is indeed in the imperative, i.e. asking the other person to do something, and not "I want to..."

Ok. Check this out and see if it fits in both English and the orig. language.

Thanks,

David

Hi David,
Here's what I would pare it down to:
---
Hold me now without saying anything
Everything that we see with our eyes, and that we can hold with our hands
This is a world in which nothing is certain
It's thanks to this moment that certain things can now be said
So open up your closed heart
---
Notes:
- There's no "achieving" in the original
- The second line goes with the third, not the first.
- I think no punctuation would keep it more poetic, as well as reflecting the punctuation of the original.
For your consideration!

any suggestions on how to squeeze in 全って ? I understood it stands for 'to accomplish' but to accomplish what you can see and hold sounds a bit strange.

never mind my last message, messages crossed each other it has already been answered.

the crude meaning of the 4th sentence is :
[because it's now, certain things can be said] (with an emphasis element on the whole sentence as well as the word 'can').
In my opinion, the narrator states that they have reached a point in their relation that they can now say things that could not be said before (albeit not everything). I would not stress the fact that it's the present, but put emphasis on the fact that things can be said now. although not very literal, I would prefer the following translation:

We've reached a point that things can be said

Tell you what Nego,

You have the best imput from Ian and the best English edit I can do. I suggest you edit you stuff now and we put it to a vote. What will be will be.

Hi,

This is getting strange. Ian and I worked with him and got to something we felt could go up for a vote. When it went up, he voted against his own translation. I just don't have any more time for this guy. Administrative decision is needed here.

Maybe Nego voted against his own translation by error?

I didn't vote against it by error, it's just that in this form I would like to see a little change. The translation was up for a vote before I could express this opinion so I thought that voting against it would give me the chance of adding my comment ( as far as I know you cannot add a comment when you agree with a translation).

I'm sorry for any misunderstanding but I wasn't aware I broke any procedures here.

Hi Nego, I see your problem!
You read
全て
"subete"
as
全って
"mattotte"
but you can see you need the little "tsu" character in between them for this reading to be possible, and in the context, the only natural reading for this would be "subete", i.e. "everything" or "all"
so the meaning is
"the subete" that we can touch with our eyes or hold with our hands
i.e.
everything that we can see or hold
Do you see how this works?

David, if you like, I can fix it and validate it. I can take the responsibility for it, because I know exactly what it means (it's a very simple poem/simple lyrics), and it means exactly what my final version above says.

Ok Ian,

I suggest you go for it. And thanks.

Pleasure! Thanks for all your work on this, too!

Hi Nego, do you like this version of your translation now?

It's perfect Ian, thanks for your help on this one.