Haces que mi alma sienta amor de nuevo Haces que a tu lado ya no sienta miedo Haces que me entregue con cada latido Y que no quiera ni un segundo sin estar contigo
Notas sobre a tradução
Manau, kad Äia ispanų kalba. Ja kalbama mexikieÄių serialuose.
<reedición>: -Pongo los acentos que faltaban ("frio", asi"...) y separo versos que estaban erróneamente unidos. -Sustituyo "sufriendo" por "cubriendo" (que es la palabra correcta aquÃ). [Lev van Pelt]
You arrive, a long wait is finished This winter becomes spring because you arrive And I warm myself in you
You arrive when I disbelieved everything Like the light of dawn you arrive And I shelter in you
And so you cover the cold with love You make me feel better For you arrive kindling the heart
You cause my soul to feel love anew At your side I’m not afraid anymore You attain my surrender with each heartbeat And I don't want a single second without you
Notas sobre a tradução
I've not intended to be literal in every verse, but faithful to their sense (and, when possible, to their breath and rhythm).
Último validado ou editado por lilian canale - 24 Outubro 2012 19:27
I noticed a few things that I think could make this sound more natural, or slightly more accurate. Feel free to disregard my remarks if you think it disrupts the poetry
- se acabó - is finished, not finishes
- I warm myself in you
- the light of dawn
- for you arrive kindling the heart
- you cause my soul to feel love anew
I agree with several of your remarks, specially the second (to add "myself" and change the preposition, even if I would choose "with" instead of "in" ); the fourth ("for" sounds better than "since" ); and the last one (this "to" was actually missing).
With regard to the first verse, that second verb should strictly be in past tense, as you note, but I like it better in present; of course, I leave it for Lilian (and you) to decide.
Your third point is good as well, and "[the] light of dawn" –maybe without the article-- could be substituted for "dawning light". I leave this also to your criterion )
Many thanks for your interest and your help!