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Traduko - Serba-Franca - ovde je prelepo,uživam u sučevim zracima i toplom...

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Kategorio Taga vivo - Infanoj kaj dekkelkuloj

Titolo
ovde je prelepo,uživam u sučevim zracima i toplom...
Teksto
Submetigx per robertokamalejo
Font-lingvo: Serba

Ovde je prelepo.Volela bih da zajedno uživamo u sučevim zracima i toplom moru.Želim da znaš da mislim na tebe.Sledeće godine bismo mogle da idemo zajedno.Volela bih da posetimo neku državu u kojoj ranije nismo bile i upoznamo nove ljude.Želim da zajedno sa mnom otkrijes lepote novih predela.

Titolo
c'est merveilleux ici, je profite des rayons de soleil et de la mer chaude
Traduko
Franca

Tradukita per anazoe
Cel-lingvo: Franca

C´est merveilleux ici. J´aimerais qu´on puisse profiter ensemble des rayons du soleil et de la mer chaude. Je veux que tu saches que je pense à toi. L'année prochaine j'aimerais qu'on y aille ensemble. J'aimerais visiter un pays où nous ne sommes pas encore allées et rencontrer des gens nouveaux. J'aimerais que tu découvres avec moi la beauté des paysages nouveaux.
Laste validigita aŭ redaktita de Francky5591 - 8 Decembro 2009 21:41





Lasta Afiŝo

Aŭtoro
Afiŝo

8 Decembro 2009 11:49

maki_sindja
Nombro da afiŝoj: 1206
L'année prochaine j'aimerais qu'on y aille ensemble - L'année prochaine nous pourrons y aller ensemble

8 Decembro 2009 12:03

Francky5591
Nombro da afiŝoj: 12396
Thanks marija!

About tenses used, in French it is better to use conditional, as it seems the holidays planning isn't stated yet, although there is a will to renew the pleasant experience of the past year with the addressee.

Apart from that, do you think this translation is matching the meaning from the original text?

"C´est merveilleux ici. J´aimerais qu´on puisse profiter ensemble des rayons de soleil et de la mer chaude. Je veux que tu saches que je pense à toi. L'année prochaine nous pourrions y aller ensemble. J'aimerais qu'on visite un pays ou nous ne sommes pas allées avant et que nous rencontrions des gens nouveaux. J'aimerais que tu découvres avec moi la beauté de nouveaux paysages."

and also a detail : writer's gender and addressee's gender : two girls, or a girl writing to a guy? (in the latter case it would be "...un pays où nous ne sommes pas allés..."


8 Decembro 2009 13:45

anazoe
Nombro da afiŝoj: 7
Francky,

Reading the text in Serbian, it is quite clear that a girl is writing to a girl - for example, in the conditional "bismo mogle", the paticiple is in pl. feminin.

I also think that the conditional should be translated by its equivalent- the conditional, not the future tense.

8 Decembro 2009 14:05

Francky5591
Nombro da afiŝoj: 12396
Hi anazoe, thanks for the lesson in Serbian, I didn't know about genders in the original text.

About tenses, I didn't know conditional was used in the Serbian version, but one thing is sure, conditional is used in the French version, and it is the right tense to use for such circumstances as "things one would like to do next year" future tense wouldn't be appropriate, you're right.

Do you agree with my edit on the French version :

I replaced "J'aimerais qu'on visite un pays ou nous ne sommes pas allées avant et rencontrer des gens nouveaux." by "j'aimerais que nous visitions un pays où nous ne sommes pas encore allées, et que nous rencontrions des gens nouveaux"?

Use of the infinitive in the second proposition is not appropriate, then either you use "on", or you use "nous", knowing "nous" is more correct here, "on" would rather be used (correctly) in a more general context.

8 Decembro 2009 17:44

anazoe
Nombro da afiŝoj: 7
Hi,
I agree with the use of ENCORE instead of AVANT,(even though AVANT is not incorect) and yes, the infinitive RENCONTRER was indeed a mistake.
As for ON, as it is abondantly used in informal French (and I think those sentences are of that type), I don´t think it would be a mistake to keep it. NOUS is of course grammmatically more correct.



8 Decembro 2009 18:03

maki_sindja
Nombro da afiŝoj: 1206
Sorry Franck, it's my mistake, it's conditional in Serbian too. I agree with with all your changes.
The rest is OK!

8 Decembro 2009 21:52

Francky5591
Nombro da afiŝoj: 12396
Actually, I edited in another way, closer to the way anazoe translated (use of the infinitive in the first and second propositions from the 5th sentence, that lets it be shorter and clearer than use of the subjonctive.

What I meant this early afternoon about replacing the infinitive by the subjonctive is because the first proposition had a conjugated verb at the subjunctive, and the second one had an infinitive. This is not correct. But if you use infinitive in both propositions, then it's ok, there is a balance if you see what I mean, and this evening I came to believe this text would definitely be lighter with the infinitive.


9 Decembro 2009 13:42

anazoe
Nombro da afiŝoj: 7
Francky,

but I think THE INFINITIVE IS NOT CORRECT!!:
J'aimerais visiter un pays où nous ne sommes pas encore allées et rencontrer des gens nouveaux.

because infinitive is used when the subject of the verb in the infinitive is the same as the one in the main sentence... which is not the case here, because thae girl says she would like them BOTH to see new countries and meet new people...

to me, there can only be 2 subjunctives in those sentences!

9 Decembro 2009 13:58

Francky5591
Nombro da afiŝoj: 12396
Yes, anazoe, I confirm infinitive is correctly used here. If infinitive doesn't formally recognize both actors of the described action, the context does ("L'année prochaine j'aimerais qu'on y aille ensemble. J'aimerais visiter un pays où nous ne sommes pas encore allées et rencontrer des gens nouveaux. J'aimerais que tu découvres avec moi la beauté des paysages nouveaux."

Everything is fine with this text, I can assume what I said in my preview post, don't worry, I'm a native speaker of the French language.