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Dịch - Polish-English - Szlifowanie

Current statusDịch
This text is available in the following languages: PolishEnglish

Nhóm chuyên mục Poetry - Exploration / Adventure

Title
Szlifowanie
Text
Submitted by Aneta B.
Source language: Polish

Dawna skorupa
dawno opuszczona
Dziś w ostrym słońcu
odbijam promienie
emocjami ...

spalam się - w ogniu - wciąż mięknę -
... Raz srebro - raz złoto ...
Doświadczenie przygodne
... Raz złe – raz dobre ....

diamentowe szlifowanie
brylanciane podziwianie

nie ma piękna bez bólu ...
Remarks about the translation
British English

Title
Grinding
Dịch
English

Translated by iluvmilka
Target language: English

Grinding

An old shell
long ago abandoned
Today in the bright Sun
I reflect the rays with
My emotions

Burning, on fire, constantly softening
Turning from silver to gold
A casual experience
Up and down

Diamond grinding
Brilliant wonder

There’s no beauty without pain
Remarks about the translation
The second stanza (paragraph) was very difficult to translate so it might be not as clear as it is in polish
Validated by lilian canale - 21 Tháng 10 2009 13:26





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Tác giả
Bài gửi

16 Tháng 10 2009 00:17

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Beautiful translation! Thank you, dear one!

16 Tháng 10 2009 10:06

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
You're welcome

16 Tháng 10 2009 19:26

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Dawna skorupa
dawno opuszczona

You traslated:
An old crust
long deserted

and you were not sure about it...

Well, it literally means: The old/former crust was left a long time ago...

Maybe experts can help here, Ania...

p.s. Thank yoy for translating also the title. I'm stil forgeting to put the titles into a translation field...

16 Tháng 10 2009 22:41

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
No, i got the first stanza but i didnt the second one : spalam się - w ogniu - wciąż mięknę -
... Raz srebro - raz złoto ...
Doświadczenie przygodne
... Raz złe – raz dobre ....

I get it but it was very difficult to translate

16 Tháng 10 2009 22:54

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
I can't underatand your "no", Ania... ?

... Raz srebro - raz złoto ...
Doświadczenie przygodne
... Raz złe – raz dobre ....

Litterally:

...Once (the)silver - once (the)gold [is appearing]
Accidental experience
... once good - once bad [one]


17 Tháng 10 2009 12:21

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
Aneta, you are absolutelty right but that is a literal translations and i dont think it has any meaning in english

17 Tháng 10 2009 12:49

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Yes, I know. This is why we should wait for experts as always...
Take it easy Ania. If you have any other suggestions, don't hesitate to express them here... You probably have noticed I also don't hesitate to discuss... It is needed to improve the translations.
Moreover "Co dwie głowy to nie jedna"

17 Tháng 10 2009 15:49

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
Hi girls

I'll work on this one to help you, but I don't think there will be much to do. It looks fine to me.
Perhaps the beginning could be:
"An old crust (shell?)
long ago abandoned..."

And this part:

"Burning, on fire, constantly softening
Turning from silver into gold..."


17 Tháng 10 2009 19:30

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
Ok, i've changed "burning, on fire ...". Obviously 'long ago abandonded" sounds right too ... what do you think Aneta? It's up to you

17 Tháng 10 2009 22:40

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Yes, of course, it can be shell instaed of crust... I would choose this more pejorative one, but I don't now which it is...hehe

"long ago abandonded"
"burning, of fire..."
- all sound great! Thanks, girls!
I'm so grateful for your work on my "poems"...

17 Tháng 10 2009 22:36

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
OK then, Ania if you make these edits we can set a poll. I think it looks and sounds good.

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:00

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
Done

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:09

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
To the poll!

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:13

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
Oh, if you want something stronger instead of shell/crust , what about "carcass"?

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:18

iluvmilka
Tổng số bài gửi: 77
I didn't know that word ... well, it is strong but i don't think it has the same meaning. What do you think Aneta? In my dictionary it says that caracas is "padlina, ścierwo albo zwłoki zwierząt". It's not what you meant, is it?

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:21

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
carcass is used figuratively as: something lifeless, empty

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:33

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Well, I meant about sth like "shell", "crust", "box" or even "prison"... It was to be a symbol of my depression - state of mind when we are closed in ourselves...

I wrote it just after the state had passed by...

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:29

lilian canale
Tổng số bài gửi: 14972
Oh, well, then I guess 'shell' is fine

17 Tháng 10 2009 23:32

Aneta B.
Tổng số bài gửi: 4487
Yes, I guess it is the best equivalent of Polish "skorupa"...