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翻译 - 英语-意大利语 - For a platonic future...当前状态 翻译
讨论区 诗歌 - 爱 / 友谊 | | |
For a platonic future...
With my dream I touch your face it beams with love foretelling fidelity in a platonic future
Your sheltering presence ensures the joy of existence ensures warm silence all over the winter living beside
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| | | 目的语言: 意大利语
Per un futuro platonico
Con il mio sogno Tocco la tua faccia Trasmette con amore La fedeltà veggente In un futuro platonico
La tua presenza rassicurante Assicura la gioia dell'esistenza Assicura un caldo silenzio Nello stare vicini durante l'inverno. |
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最近发帖 | | | | | 2013年 一月 2日 23:15 | | | Here too, Aneta, do you think the meaning matches the source text?
| | | 2013年 一月 4日 17:41 | | | Hi GhiRic and Alex,
Thank you for the translation.
It looks very nice to me.
Could we just make the last line shorter?
"Nel inverno del tuo vivere/essere vicino"?
Anyway, I'm not good at Italian enough to suggest anything. | | | 2013年 二月 28日 23:28 | | | Hi Alex,
You know, I'm still not sure of the last line. I know you've already accepted the translation, however the word "vicini" sounds bad to me, because I associate it with emotional "closeness" meanwhile the Polish line means something quite opposite.
"w zimÄ™ naszego trwania OBOK"
It was translated into English
"all over the winter living beside"
"Living beside" or better "our living beside" in this case means that we stay apart, that we stay/live nearby but yet far away (emotionally), because we can't be together anymore. That is why I called this period a "winter" and it doesn't refer to a real season of a year, but it is just a metaphor, a kind of our "life winter" when there is no us anymore.
Hope you see what I mean.
| | | 2013年 二月 28日 23:41 | | | Yes, I understand what you mean.
what about "nello stare vicini durante il FREDDO"?
freddo, cold, might mean that the feelings the two people have reciprocally are not warm anymore, as you mean.
Another possibility could be "il gelo" which I think has a "higher stylistic level".
Let me know what you think!
| | | 2013年 二月 28日 23:45 | | | But is the word "vicini" appropriate? | | | 2013年 三月 1日 00:04 | | | mmm, probably if we leave "vicini" it gives a sense of closeness, as you say.
what about "nel nostro vivere nel gelo"?
I hope it is better to you! | | | 2013年 三月 1日 00:14 | | | Is "vivere accanto" possible? | | | 2013年 三月 1日 00:21 | | | yes, why not.. vivere accanto is another possibility.. | | | 2013年 三月 1日 16:37 | | | Sorry for having accepted this translation in a hurry! Have you two come to an agreement? | | | 2013年 三月 2日 01:03 | | | No problem, Alex
I appreciate all suggestions of the translator. Thanks for them, GhiRic!
I guess English version of the line may bring some misunderstanding. Maybe it lacks some words and it should be read as follows: "all over the winter OF OUR living beside*".
* "living beside" yet means here being emotionally apart. It's about living beside each other but not with each other.
so:
nel inverno + Genetive
nel inverno del nostro vivere accanto?
Alex, maybe I can explain it to you in Latin?
"In hieme nostri vivendi iuxta"
| | | 2013年 三月 2日 13:03 | | | Hi guys,
I've just come up with an idea that maybe an adjective "invernale"/"freddo" (?) would work here. In the English epression "winter living beside" a word "winter" was just used as an adjective that discribes a noun "living".
What do you think? |
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