Translation - Pools-Engels - MewaCurrent status Translation
Category Poetry - Liefde / Vriendskap | | Text Submitted by ji2 | Source language: Pools
Tęsknota nade mną szeleszcze. Trąca mnie skrzydłem mewiem. Czy wciąż ta sama jeszcze? Nie wiem! nie wiem... (Maria Pawlikowska-Jasnorzewska) |
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| | | Target language: Engels
Yearning swishes upon my head. Touches me with a seagull's wing. Is it still the same one? I don't know! I don't know... (Maria Pawlikowska-Jasnorzewska)
| Remarks about the translation | The original one consists rhymes in ABAB pattern. |
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Laaste geakkrediteerde redigering deur Tantine - 28 Januarie 2008 21:23
Last messages | | | | | 25 Januarie 2008 16:39 | | | Hi Olesniczanin
Maybe "seagull" should be in one word?
I'm not sure about the choice of the word "swishes", which is a word I associate more with cloth, curtains, large twirling dresses or skirts, or with paint but not really with seagulls or yearning.
I've opened a poll because I don't speak any Polish at all
Bises
Tantine
| | | 26 Januarie 2008 17:20 | | | Hi Tantine,
thanks for your remarks.
According to wiki: "In common usage, members of various gull species are often referred to as sea gulls or seagulls." Anyway, "seagull" really might be smoother as I think it's more common than "sea gull".
As far as "swishes" is concerned, what would you suggest instead? "Rustles"? I picked "swishes" because it's connected with silk and makes a nice alliteration. What do you think?
Oleśniczanin.
| | | 26 Januarie 2008 22:39 | | | Hi
I like the word "swishes".
It makes me think of "swoop", "rustle",
We can keep it
bises
Tantine | | | 27 Januarie 2008 11:13 | | | Hi Tantine,
"Seagull" is corrected, we keep "swishes" . Once again, thanks for your remarks.
Oleśniczanin. | | | 28 Januarie 2008 00:04 | | | Hi Olesniczanin
I'll validate your text now
Enjoy your points
Bises
Tantine |
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