Перевод - Эсперанто-Английский - mi sentis sekuron, la sono de la viro sur la rook...

Hi zciric

I don't think we have many people who speak Esperanto; could you help me evaluate this text please? Thanks!

CC: zciric

What I should to check?

If the English translation was the "aim",
it is good, only in two places there is need for changes, I think.

The parts between '=':

"...and a second later, =we were submerged in cold water=, the laughing sound repeated many times in my ear,..."
surŝprucigis nin malvarma akvo -
better is: sprinkled us cold water

And the second thing is:
"...that woman said smiling: =Go with Grandfather=, we must save him;..."

In the Esperanto text the meaning is more for:
"Go TO Grandfather...", not 'WITH'.

If you need any further help... write.

Greetings
Zoran

Thanks Zoran, that's very helpful