Tłumaczenie - Francuski-Angielski - Gloria tu manques dans l'air

This is amazing, Tantine - I can't believe you made it rhyme!

Can you think of an alternative phrase to "I now give a miss"? I'm not sure that would be understood.

How about, "A mouth which yours no longer greets,
thinks of you and no longer eats"? It's not great; can you work with it?

Hi Kafetzou,

I love translating poetry and getting it to rhyme!

This turn of phrase didn't please me too much either, even though it rhymed well. Its a little too "precious" for the general tone.

How about:

My lips, which yours no longer meet,
All nourrishment refuse to eat

If not, your own suggestion is a good itself itself and would suit me fine.

Bises
Tantine

Oh yes - this is much better! I'll edit it and accept it.