Size Betül hakkıında üzücü bir gelişmenin haberini vermek istedim. Betül geçtiğimiz çarşamba implat cihazının iç parçası bozulduğu için ameliyat oldu. Morali çok bozuldu. Belki de sadece bir mesaj yazarak onu çok mutlu edebilirsiniz. Çünkü yanında birilerinin olduğunu bilmek ona çok iyi gelir. Bu gelişmeleri benim size aktardığımı Betül'e söylemeyin, sürpriz olsun.
I've wanted to tell you of a disappointing event about Betül. Since the inside part of the implant device was broken, she had an operation last Wednesday. She feels depressed. Maybe you can make her happy just by sending her a message, because it's good for her to know she has people beside her. Don't tell Betül I've told you this, just surprise her.
Laatst goedgekeurd of bewerkt door Lein - 19 januari 2012 16:16
- 'to inform you' sounds very formal. How about 'I wanted to tell you'?
- disappointing
- 'had been broken' implies somebody broke it. Shouldn't this be 'was broken' or 'broke'?
- 'by sending her only one message': this gives the impression you don't think the person should send her more than one. How about 'just by sending her a message'?
- 'these events' again sounds rather formal. Why not just 'this'?
Let me know if you agree and one of us can edit; then I'll set a poll