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Prevod - Nemacki-Engleski - Wundenhaupt

Trenutni statusPrevod
Ovaj tekst je raspoloziv na sledecim jezicima: NemackiEngleski

Kategorija Pesma

Natpis
Wundenhaupt
Tekst
Podnet od Freya
Izvorni jezik: Nemacki

Auf dunklen Bänken sitzen sie gedrängt
Und heben die erlosch`nen Blicke auf
Zum Kreuz. Die Lichter schimmern wie verhängt,
Und trüb und wie verhängt das Wundenhaupt.
Napomene o prevodu
I would like to have translated only this first part of the song 'Die tote Kirche', by L'Âme Immortelle.
Thank you. :)

Natpis
On dark benches they sit closelyAnd ...
Prevod
Engleski

Preveo Zwenni
Željeni jezik: Engleski

On dark benches they sit closely
And rise the extinct gazes up
To the cross. The lights shimmer as if covered,
And hazy and as if covered, the wounded head.
Poslednja provera i obrada od Lein - 9 Septembar 2010 14:21





Poslednja poruka

Autor
Poruka

7 Septembar 2010 11:59

Lein
Broj poruka: 3389
Hi Zwenni,

This looks good. I've set a poll to get some imput from others.

Just a style-related remark:

I think 'as if' would sound better here than 'like', in both cases, but especially in the last sentence. Do you agree? Let me konw what you think!
Thanks

7 Septembar 2010 12:53

Zwenni
Broj poruka: 4
Hi Lein,

you are right. I totally agree on your remark and would change "like" to "as if" in both cases

Regards
Zwenni

7 Septembar 2010 14:52

Lein
Broj poruka: 3389
This is a remark from Lilian; see if you agree:

My doubt is if "woundhead" is a noun in English. Shouldn't it be "the wounded head"?

If so, then I think a comma is needed.

"...and (also? ) hazy and as if covered, the wounded head."

7 Septembar 2010 15:53

Zwenni
Broj poruka: 4
Again, I have to agree

I would use:

"and hazy and as if covered, the wounded head."

7 Septembar 2010 15:56

Lein
Broj poruka: 3389
Done!
Thank you!