Translation - Turks-Engels - Size Betül hakkıında üzücü bir gelişmenin...

Hi rollingmaster


A few suggestions:

- 'to inform you' sounds very formal. How about 'I wanted to tell you'?
- disappointing
- 'had been broken' implies somebody broke it. Shouldn't this be 'was broken' or 'broke'?
- 'by sending her only one message': this gives the impression you don't think the person should send her more than one. How about 'just by sending her a message'?
- 'these events' again sounds rather formal. Why not just 'this'?

Let me know if you agree and one of us can edit; then I'll set a poll

Thank you