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Translation - Turkish-English - bir geceligine

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กลุ่ม Free writing - Love / Friendship

This translation request is "Meaning only".
Title
bir geceligine
Text
Submitted by Francky5591
Source language: Turkish

"Ey Sevgili!
-Bir geceliğine değiş tokuş etseydik yüreğimizi,
-Taşıyabilir miydin acaba bendeki seni
Remarks about the translation
Français de France

Title
For a night
Translation
English

Translated by Mesud2991
Target language: English

O darling!
If we had an exchange of hearts for a night,
Could you carry the 'you' which is inside me?
Remarks about the translation
The person's love is so big that s/he wonders if his/her beloved can carry it. The person's love was expressed as 'you inside me".
Validated by Lein - 2 February 2012 14:48





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31 January 2012 17:24

Lein
จำนวนข้อความ: 3389
Hi Mesud2991

Are you sure about the last sentence? Should it not be either of the following?

Could I carry you inside me

or

Could you put you (or: yourself) inside me

That just seems to make more sense. However, I don't speak Turkish, so please let me know what you think!

31 January 2012 17:32

Mesud2991
จำนวนข้อความ: 1331
What is wrong with the last sentence? Because your suggestions are wrong compared to the original.

31 January 2012 17:38

Lein
จำนวนข้อความ: 3389
OK, thanks, in that case I will leave this as it is It just sounds a bit illogical, but that may be the same in the original
I will set a poll.

31 January 2012 18:05

Mesud2991
จำนวนข้อความ: 1331
Then, let me explain:

The person's love is so big that s/he wonders if his/her beloved can carry it. The person's love was expressed as 'you inside me".

31 January 2012 18:16

Lein
จำนวนข้อความ: 3389
I see! I have put the explanation under the translation. Thank you!

31 January 2012 18:51

Arnavut Biberi
จำนวนข้อความ: 74
"O darling" should be used instead of "hey darling".
And "acaba" was not translated into English, we can say "I wonder" for this word.

And I am not sure about the correctness of last part, "bendeki sen". It's hard to translate.

31 January 2012 18:54

Arnavut Biberi
จำนวนข้อความ: 74
"I wonder, could you carry ‘yourself’ which is inside me."

I don't know if it is correct or not, maybe you can correct it Lein


31 January 2012 18:56

Lein
จำนวนข้อความ: 3389
That sounds good! I'll wait for Mesud's reaction before editing anything.

31 January 2012 19:01

merdogan
จำนวนข้อความ: 3769
I also agree w. yourself.

31 January 2012 19:09

Mesud2991
จำนวนข้อความ: 1331
No need to say 'I wonder'. While translating, you shouldn't translate word for word. For instance,

What should we do? (In Turkish, 'ne yapsak acaba?')
Do the English say 'I wonder if what we should do'?

CC: Arnavut Biberi

31 January 2012 19:11

Mesud2991
จำนวนข้อความ: 1331
If it's better than mine, let's edit it.

31 January 2012 19:14

Arnavut Biberi
จำนวนข้อความ: 74
Umm.. But it is better when we read the whole text, yes there is no need to translate "acaba" every time. If we put "I wonder", the purpose of exchanging will be expressed clearly according to text. But it is up to you.

2 February 2012 14:48

Lein
จำนวนข้อความ: 3389
Hi both

I think we do not really need 'I wonder', because the sentence makes it clear that the person is wondering etc.
I have edited in a slightly different way and accepted the translation - please let me know if you don't agree

2 February 2012 15:51

Arnavut Biberi
จำนวนข้อความ: 74
It's good, Lein